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幽默冷笑话五则

时间2018-06-29 冷笑话 我要投稿

1路过个小吃店店员说肉夹馍好吃我看看不远处的鱿鱼摊说不了我想吃那个

店员如临大敌说那个不好吃整条街数它生意差

正说着另一店员举着好几串大鱿鱼进来嚷嚷来来来你们的最爱买来了

原先那店员尴尬地看着我悲壮地咬一口鱿鱼说都是街坊总不能看着他们饿死

2有一次手机坏了下午手机修好刚开机一个陌生的号码就打进来了一开口就是你电话咋一直关机我都打了一个下午了你干啥去了一个小姑娘在外地上学都不知道随时保持电话顺畅吗你知道你爸妈会有多担心吗

我弱弱的问了一句你谁啊

那边中气十足地说我是中通快递北门取快递快点儿

3楼下卖蜂窝煤的骑着三轮吆喝道蜂窝煤了煤了煤了

我打开窗户朝他吼道?#22909;?#20102;你喊个毛线啊

4下班坐公交?#25285;?#26377;个私?#39029;?#25377;在了公交车前面磨磨蹭蹭的也不快开司机师傅绕过?#39034;?#26102;说出了技惊四座的话语拉一个女的就得得瑟瑟的都不知道咋开了我TM拉一车女的也没那样啊

5街上看到一个乞丐我想过年时候还乞讨肯定是真的就走过去让他前面的碗里面丢了一块钱

结果他对我竖起两个指头说还差两块我纳闷了说为啥他解释道你不知道过年期间3倍工资啊

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